Happy to share that I’ll be speaking at Elevate & Succeed virtual networking event on April 8th, 2025 from 9:45 AM!

Think about a toxic colleague you’ve worked with. Though you may be pretty content with your job, what does it feel like when they bad-mouth the company, complain about their work, or manipulate people to get what they want? It leaves a bad taste in your mouth; it stays with you. Without even realizing it, you can spread that negativity to your partner over dinner, and even to your partner’s colleagues the next day, one study found.

Like a pebble dropped into a lake, our actions ripple out into the world around us. Each ripple influences what it encounters, which in turn ripples out even farther. When you hold the door open for someone, for example, it may inspire a willingness for them to do so for the next person or to extend a different kindness that would not have existed without your influence. Similarly, when you snap at someone, chances are their spouse, friend, or child will be subject to the ripple effects of your action. I like to refer to this ability of ours to influence the world around us as our radiance—literally, what we radiate.

The nature of our radiance is often a reflection of what’s going on inside. It’s why cultivating self-awareness, far from being selfish, is vitally important. If we remain unaware of (or unwilling to) take responsibility for our lesser qualities, such as negativity or anger, we will inevitably pass them on to those in our proximity. The
charge of your words or actions begins to shape the world around you to parallel the one within. Your lack of enthusiasm for a project drains the team of theirs. Watch your bad mood be served back to you in the silence of your partner over dinner.

I’m not suggesting that you force yourself to become a chirpy Disney character with rainbows of perpetual optimism blasting out your nose. Rather, we have an obligation to address our weaknesses and to build on our strengths because we’re not alone. Cultivating our potential makes us more valuable to ourselves and to others, especially those closest to us.

Though you can’t control people, you will in some way influence those you come in contact with, and they in turn may carry forward that influence. Your knowledge can teach others. Your hard work can inspire others. Your positive mood can uplift others. Seth Godin once wrote, *You’re either the person who creates energy. Or you’re the one who destroys it.”

Bettering yourself leads to bettering others and—if we play that ripple effect all the way out to its infinite potential and multiply it by every willing soul—to bettering the world. If you don’t want to become better for yourself, do it for them. If your goal in life is to be useful to others, you can start by figuring out how to be useful to yourself.

Video from the last event

Register today for next week’s Elevate and Succeed virtual networking event. Seating is limited.